After months of cajoling, conspiring and counting almost 1/3rd of our 1996 batch from Loreto Convent Ranchi met for a two-day reunion at the Angsana resort in Bengaluru on the 27th and 28th of June. This could not have been possible without the meticulous planning and preparation undertaken by our Bengaluru based friends. It was a particularly effortless visit for those of who flew in from foreign locations, outside the country. We almost felt as if our Bengaluru friends were playing hosts, and for those 2 days it was a home away from home.
Two friends met at the airport itself as we took the same flight from Delhi to Bengaluru. As the familiar Ranchi accent, tone and vocabulary marked our conversation, the heart really gladdened. Those 30 years since school and nothing had changed. There was so much to talk about, to share. We had all made many inward and outward journeys, become successful and influential professionals, wives, mothers, daughters, care givers, spiritual seekers, responsible citizens and globe trotters. Many of us had last seen each other as teenagers, unaware of how the 30 years in between have transformed the giggly, nervous, hopeful and boisterous schoolgirls we once were into the responsible and professional women we now are.
Our small-town values were intact, even as we had covered great distances and achieved material and intellectual prosperity. In our stories we shared, we were all in sync in terms of our treatment of those around us, and how we saw our privilege – not as a matter of entitlement but something with which we could bring changes in the world around us. Most of us had struggled with societal pressures, parental ambitions, competitiveness, lack of resources and demanding personal situations in our own life journeys – and yet we had not let anything break our spirits, take away from our humanity and our sense of selves.
Among several things I learnt during those two days was that our small-town values included a moral compass with which we constantly evaluated our actions and its impact on those around us. Nothing had changed and being thoughtful and aware about our surroundings came naturally to us. We cleaned up the rooms after every mayhem, with the same commitment as we cleaned up the far field after every lunch break. Our ‘sorry, thank you and please’ were as intact as they were under the watchful eyes of our teachers all those years ago. No one complained about little inconveniences, as we had so much to be grateful for.
What struck me was the amazing creativity that defined not just the vocation we had all chosen, but also the persons we had become. Creativity that is essential in all kinds of problem solving- professional and personal. Creativity in the form of ideas and alternatives; creativity that is also about communicating with others and keeping ourselves cheerful and entertained. Our laughter and sense of humour were intact after all these years, even as we had learnt vital lessons of taking things in our stride.
Some regaled the group with their memories of school, humorously told; others underwent a snake dance initiation upon their arrival; some chatted away with long lost friends; some others reminisced about their difficult life situations; some made up after many lost years of silly quarrels – but all of us reconnected and shared our professional and personal journeys after school; ate heartily the offerings at the resort and drank to our hearts content. The hang over was only about fun and laughter as we danced into the night. We just let our hair down and had fun, forgetting every other role that defines us. We were not research scientists, life coaches, marathon runners, musicians, dancers, artists, NGO activists, corporate professionals, doctors, engineers, fashion designers, trainers, students, teachers, architects, businesswomen, craftswomen, consultants, academics, mothers, wives, daughters, sisters and so much more. We were only girls out there wanting to relive our past memories and have some fun together, connect with ourselves and each other, become once again the young hopeful creatures we were, before life’s many responsibilities took over. We did exactly that.
Almost 30 years have literally flown by and it did not take us time to transform into the giggly school girls we once were – on the cusp of discovering our worlds, and taking our ‘roads not taken’ to make the sense of it. We have had such magnificent and inspiring journeys, while we have also weathered so many storms and faced unfathomable challenges and even tragedies along the way. Our friendships, our values, our cultural and familial rootedness, our inner strengths and character have helped us embrace every experience and navigate differences and adversities with resilience, awe and wonder, not always with fear and anxiety.
The collective professional brilliance and wisdom in that space was only matched by the thoughtful and nurturing optimism that each one of us have embodied over the years. As someone who teaches and writes about war and conflict and international relations for a living, these times seem like a dystopia we are living through. Nothing is in order, explicable or remotely hopeful in the world we inhabit. Meeting my school friends who are making small scale but impactful differences in their professions and in their immediate surroundings, in their families and communities made me realise that melancholia is also a state of mind, as much as it is shaped by the world around us. Living in these times is a burden made easy by friends who teach you that you have to value every moment; you have to accept the despair and sadness, along with the joyful moments that you must actively create. Most importantly you have to do your bit to make this world liveable – every little bit counts. We did precisely that. We lived, we loved, we shared and we made memories.
I am so privileged, so proud to belong to this batch of the most brilliant women from Loreto Convent Ranchi who are shaping lives, transforming the world around them and are beautiful soul sisters, standing together in adversity and in celebration of all that is life affirming and wonderful. As the poet Hasan Kamaal said all those years ago,
ये साथ गुज़ारे हुए लम्हात की दौलत
जज़्बात की दौलत ये ख़यालात की दौलत
कुछ पास न हो पास ये सौगात तो होगी
बीते हुए लम्हों की कसक साथ तो होगी
ख़्वाबों में ही हो चाहे मुलाक़ात तो होगी…….
Thank you universe for these precious moments. So honoured to be part of this group of wonder women. This reunion was truly my antidote to the despair around me. ❤️
Kaalratri 